The Queen of Hearts
by Takara Phoenix
Summary: Ares really wants to get laid. Aphrodite really wants to scheme and chatter about her plans for certain demigods. What a god has to endure to get laid... Ares/Aphrodite


PJatO || Arodite || PJatO || Arodite || The Queen of Hearts || Arodite || PJatO || Arodite || PJatO

Title: The Queen of Hearts – Or: When the King can't Ace

Fandom: Percy Jackson and the Olympians / Heroes of Olympus; post Lost Hero

PJatO Disclaimer: All rights reserved to Rick Riordan for he created the awesomeness that is Nico di Angelo. And everything else related to Percy Jackson and the Olympians / Heroes of Olympus. Aside from the Gods, of course. They are all copyright by the old Greeks. This fanfiction on the other hand is entirely mine. No money is made with this, though reviews are more than welcomed.

Warnings: hetero, fluff, failed trying to get laid, shipping, shounen-ai, shoujo-ai

Main Pairing: Ares/Aphrodite

Side Pairings: Piper/Annabeth, Jason/Reyna, Nico/Percy (future), Jason/Piper (past), Percy/Annabeth (past)

Percy Jackson Characters: Ares, Aphrodite

Summary: All Ares really wants is getting laid, instead he has to listen to his girlfriend's scheming. But that's what you have to endure for dating the goddess of love...

**The Queen of Hearts**

_Or: When the King can't Ace_

"Love", growled Ares in a husky and quite horny voice. "How about we take my bike-"

"Mh... Piper would look good in a biker outfit", mused Aphrodite thoughtful, waving her boyfriend off as she hastily made her way over to her desk. "I'm sure young Annabeth would enjoy that. Oh! I have to make a note for her next make-over!"

"Her next...?", groaned the God of War annoyed. "Aphrodite, why are we talking about your daughter's next fashion trip? I had other intentions."

"You have to keep young love spicy", snickered Aphrodite with sparkling eyes. "And the child of Athena is too uptight for my liking. I have to keep this interesting!"

Ares frowned and stared out of the door at his waiting bike, before he heaved an exhausted sigh. He knew Aphrodite long enough to know when to just give up and keep her entertained. Walking over to his girlfriend, he pulled a chair up to sit next to her and lay one arm around her shoulder. Looking past her (for now) golden locks, he watched how her nimble fingers shifted cards. Cards with detailed portraits of demigods. At the moment, there was the card of Piper (Ares made a point of at least knowing the first names of Aphrodite's more 'featured' children; she could get pissed if not and that resulted in no sex for Ares) and one of that blonde-haired daughter of Athena. On blondie's other side, with a little space between them, was that blasted Poseidon brat smiling up at him, making Ares scowl in annoyance.

"Didn't you use to, what do you call it, to boat the blonde with uncle Poseidon's brat?"

"Ship", corrected the Goddess of Love slightly amused. "To ship and not to boat. And yes, for a little while. They were such opposites, it intrigued me. But now it bores me. She's all about brains and plans, he's all about acting and trying. They fight about that all the time. And she intimidates him. He was downright frightened when they had their first month's anniversary, it was ridiculous. No, he needs someone who makes him feel safe and at ease, someone who is his opposite, but doesn't contradict him. I'm still contemplating who to chose, but I had to break those two up. I simply had. Especially when I saw how Annabeth, that's her name by the way, interacted with Piper and guided her through camp. There was a... spark."

She looked highly concentrated as she stared at the cards of Piper and Annabeth, absentmindedly grabbing Percy's card to play with it thoughtful. Ares had not really listened, but he loved that sparkling of her eyes when she was talking so fiercely about these things.

"The fact aside that mom had planned for your daughter to date dad's bastard son", snorted Ares.

An elegant golden eyebrow arched upward, ice-blue eyes freezing just a tint more, her grip on the card tightening slightly. "Your mother has no right to mingle with _my_ realm like that. I simply had to break Jason and Piper up again. She should stick to blessing weddings, instead of messing with love. I'd rather see Jason with Reyna, the girl is truly dedicated and loves him. Even though I had spend so much time forcing them apart. But that way, I got to annoy Hera some."

"Of course, love", nodded Ares, knowing when it was his queue to agree with her. "Then who do you want to see Poseidon's brat with, if not with... Annemary?"

Showing interest. If he showed interest, he would get a treat later on. And he was even half-way certain he had gotten the girl's name right. Looking kind of proud of himself, he kissed her shoulder.

"Like I said, I'm not sure yet", hummed Aphrodite thoughtful and leaned back in her chair, right into his administrations, purring slightly. "But I'm leaning toward Nico di Angelo. The son of Hades, for your information. He has that... deeply seated darkness, while Percy is so full of light and hope. It's a nicely fit balance. And Nico is pretty good at dealing with Percy, he relies on the son of Poseidon. Besides, it would be the ultimate thing to piss Hera and some others off. The sons of Poseidon and Hades together, scandalous!"

She giggled delighted and turned around, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Her eyes were hooded and darkened with lust. Ares smirked, already smelling victory.

"That sounds like fun", chuckled the God of War, smelling a nearing conflict in this.

"I know something else that sounds like fun", purred Aphrodite, sealing his lips with hers.

Ares grinned like a satisfied cat in the sun. He knew it was always worth it to listen to her and give in to her odd little moods about setting demigods up. Aphrodite and her boats, he would never understand it but he thoroughly appreciated the sex he would get for paying attention.

_~*~ The End ~*~_

* * *

_Author's note: I'm currently on a run to write pairings I haven't written so far even though I ship them. So here it was, my second favorite pairing of the gods. ;)  
_


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